Only in Egypt

This is too funny.  I have personally seen a lot of the things in this video happening in the street.  I had myself a good laugh.  Especially from the traffic and spelling mistakes, classic Egypt.  Just realized there is music ( I usually have my speakers off.)

 

 

 

 

Here I felt bad for the donkey, but they really do use them like this.

 

And here’s another one that doesn’t surprise me.  Alhamdulillah, no one was hurt.

 

The Ugly American?

We took a walk the other day to a new park, one recommended by a sister who lives close-by.  It was just fives minutes away, and we were the only people there, at first.  On our way home, a man watching from the adjoining apartment complex, first stared, then asked, “What, are you guys in a gang or something?”  The question was so ridiculous to me, that I just ignored him.  There was a change in his demeanor at once.  “Well you look damn stupid.  Don’t bring your a** around here again, or I’ll kick your a**.”  Of course I ignored him and concentrated on getting my kids out of there, all the while they are asking questions.  Such as, ”Mom, why is that man saying that?”  I tried to explain the best I could, while they insulted the man and said what their dad would do to him if he were there. 

I thought about it later and considered it odd the man never once insulted Islam or muslims directly.  For all I know he had no idea we were muslims.  It could be his question was serious and he really wanted to know why we were dressed as we were.  Perhaps his anger came from feeling foolish that I ignored him.  Allahu alim, maybe I missed a teaching opportunity.   I’ll have to be more careful in the future about dismissing questions I think are stupid.  Dh put the burden on me and said I never should have been walking in this area (slightly rednecky).

I seem to generate more comments than previous years.  While in a restroom in Walmart an older woman came and stood in front of me, just looking.  I thought maybe she wanted something behind me, but then she started speaking; “You know, a person can’t tell if you are a man or a woman under all that.”  Me, looking at her blankly.  She went on, “You could have a bomb or a gun under those clothes.”  At this point, I interjected that anyone could carry a gun, even she.  She might have one in her handbag.  “I don’t have a gun, “she protested.  But you could have one, I argued.  She advised me to think about her comments.  I have, but not in the way she probably meant.

Did we make the right choice?

I will be honest.  I felt a sort of relief to be coming home.  Living in Egypt (or anywhere overseas, imho) can be stressful.  I missed home a lot.  On the other hand, in Egypt, I did feel a sense of ease that my kids were growing around muslims, and in a more Islamic environment than we could give them in America.  Everytime I would think about leaving Egypt, I would think about the challenges the kids would face here. 

The kids were initially upset with out move.  My daughter cried for one hour after saying goodbye to her Quran teacher.  My son told me he prefers Ramadan in Egypt, and asked if we could return to Egypt then.  Eventually the ease of living in America won them over.  The town we live in is very green and parks are very accessible.  I find it much easier to take them out to different places, like the library.  But the drawbacks are there.  I cringe at some of the stuff they see in outside and in stores.  And we have never been verbally assaulted in Egypt for how we dressed and unfortunately it happened fairly recently here.  I’ve noticed a change in the kids, even in this short time. 

Dh is thinking of how we might find a way to spend part of each year in Egypt.  I don’t know how I feel about that.  I really want to settle in one place.  And I don’t like the kids living without their dad for months at a time (most likely he would be working here).  I’ve been thinking of using my time here to try and finish my degree, maybe we can go somewhere besides Egypt and teach.

We plan, and Allah plans…

We’ve made Cairo our home for the past 3.5 yrs, and have lived outside of the States for the past 4yrs.  I’d fully expected to be here for at least another 2yrs, or at least until my two oldest have finished Quran (mashallah, my daughter has 2/3 memorized, and my son 1/2).  However, dh returned to America during Ramadan to work and now he’s calling us to join him!  Subhannallah!  I have to be honest, Cairo is not the easiest city to live in.  It’s overcrowded and dirty.  And prices are raising astronomically.  But mashallah, the opportunities to study Islam are very numerous.  And you can meet many people also striving to learn.  I feel very conflicted right now and hope the kids can continue their hifz in America.  We’re keeping our appliances at the house of my girls Quran teacher in case we are able to return soon.  Inshallah, I still plan to keep blogging, there is so much I want to say about our experiences here (learning arabic at Fajr Center, taxi drivers, etc), and I’d also planned to write about the time we spent in Mauritania before coming to Egypt.  Stay tuned.  I will try to answer the comments asap!    

What would you do?

I’ve had a number of cleaning women come a go, at least five.  Most of the women who clean house in Egypt (they are called shaggala) are not professional housekeepers.  The more well-off Egyptians will often hire women from other African countries to clean, and they are usually more expensive (and so I’ve heard, better at cleaning). 

I’ve had a lot of people warning me about trusting cleaning ladies (or workers in general).  Most people feel you should basically keep a watch on them at all times.  I don’t have the time or inclination to do this.  If I hire someone to clean, I don’t want to have to trail them around the house.  I’ve also been told you must be pretty firm, or else they’ll walk over you.  I’ve found this to be true also.  Most of the women started off cleaning excellently, but slacked off as time went on.  I’m just not a very good task master (or whatever you’d call standing over while they work). 

On two occasions, I’ve had stuff disappear from the house.  The first time, dh, made excuses for the person (suggesting maybe I lost the items in question, I didn’t), although no one else could have possibly taken the things that had gone missing.  For me however, the trust was basically gone, and our relationship changed.  I ceased to offer her food with us, and certainly didn’t feel like any chit-chatting.  We eventually asked her to stop coming. 

This latest time, several items have gone missing from my kitchen.  Minor stuff, two new packages of Dove soap, a full jar of honey, baking chocolate.  I’m in the middle of a move and the shaggala had been helping me to  clear the kitchen.  I noticed the soap gone right away, and the kids said ‘the cleaner must have taken it!’ (they’ve never liked any of the cleaners, but that’s a different story.)  I brushed it off, till I noticed the other items missing.  Finally I called her and asked what had happened.   She suggested that the things had gotten thrown out accidentally, and actually told me to look through the garbage for my things!  Allah knows best, I think it’s much more likely that the stuff found it’s way out of the house in the full bag of stuff she left with.  I did offer her some used clothing, and old toys.  I realize now I should have looked through the bag, but I’m just not that kind of person.  I guess I’d never make a good supervisor :).  I know that we should not accuse a muslim of theft without positive proof, and I didn’t accuse her outright.  But I can’t believe that she ‘accidentally’ threw out new items, and left empty jam jars on the counter.  It just doesn’t make sense.  I’m a pretty easy-going person, but I don’t take  kindly to people trying to walk over me.  She’d requested a few other things and actually wanted to buy some things I’m selling, but the deal is off and I don’t want her back.  It is always possible that she really did throw out a full jar of honey, but if she did, I still don’t want her back.  What would she throw away next!

The kids were complaining to our neighbor about the incident, and he told them to just forget about it and be patient.  That Allah has blessed us with more and them with less.  It’s not the stuff that really bothers me so much, it’s the idea that someone may have felt they had a right to it when it was mine.  Also the feeling of being made a fool of by trusting someone. 

Bugged Out

I am neurotic about insects.  Roaches, flies, ants.  There is no room in the house for me and them both.  I wrote about the huge roaches that come up out of the bathroom floor drain.  But during Ramadan, I had a problem with the ‘regular’ kind.  After I’d noticed a few, I figured I better check for the source.  It can be in the bags of fresh produce from the corner, or in the eggs you bought.  That’s right, eggs.  The eggs here don’t really come in cartoons, they come in an open tray, usually without any wrappings.  If you want packaging similar to what you have in the states, you can get it from the supermarket, at a higher price.  So I’d usually have my eggs delivered from a corner store (that way I don’t have to worry about breaking an open tray of eggs).  Well, one day I pick up one of my newly delivered eggs, and a roach crawls out of the place where the egg was!  Here is my source!  I took down the previous egg tray and there are about 5 roaches sitting in the darn tray!  I kill them, but I’m still noticing the darn babies.  Every night, middle of the night, I am up in the kitchen with the bottle of Raid, spraying the spots where I see them.  Finally I don’t see any more babies.  I hope I have eliminated them all, inshallah.  I really, really have a very strong distaste for roaches.  REALLY. 

Before the roaches there was some kind of ant outbreak.  Not small ants, mind you.  Those huge, oversized army-type ants.  For some odd reason they were attracted to something in the bathroom.  I kept seeing them, everytime I made a visit.  One day I noticed a large number near the toilet.  I pulled up the rug and there had to be 20-30 of ‘em under there!  And as I said, they are BIG!  It happened again with the laundry basket.  I dump the clothes to sort them out and there is a huge number of big ants inside.  More than before.  It reminded me of Alfred Hitchcock’s movie The Birds.  Except it was ants.  I was screaming and stomping at the same time.  The kids with me. 

Now I have read hadith which state not to kill ants.  And usually didn’t.  But this was just too much.  I can’t live with this many insects in my house.  The only alternative was to move.  This was all out war.  I bought some spray and started to spray the bathroom.  I also sprayed near the bottom of the front door, and some of the stairs in the stairwell (there is a crack in the stairs where you can see them coming out).  That seemed to handle it.  Oh and I also mopped with ‘gas’.  It’s sold by a man in a donkey cart.  It’s supposed to clean anything and get rid of ants.  Not sure what it is in English, turpentine maybe?  I am still not sure what attracted them in the first place.  The ants here are weird, lol.  They don’t just go for sweet stuff.  They will pick up other dead insects and carry them away.  They will cluster on snot paper (do they eat it?).   Right now it’s under control, but I expect an increase once it’s warm again. 

Travel tips

I am not really a seasoned traveler.  But I have picked up some things.  First, don’t worry if your bags are a little over the weight limit.  Most airlines won’t charge you for a pound or two.  And whatever you can’t fit in your checked luggage try to throw it into your carry-on.  I think typical allowance is up to 45lbs!  Sure, you’ll end up carrying it around, but you won’t have to pay extra.  I’ve even seen people carry more than two bags onto the plane, without any penalty.  They might just ask you to put one in plane-side check-in, but I don’t think you’ll have to pay.  Another thing not to worry about is those small connector planes.  You know, where the overhead luggage is too small to fit anything in?  They’ll just check it for you, and hand it back to you when you exit the plane. 

Use the bathroom in the beginning of the flight.  Especially for long international flights.  It starts looking like a pig sty after a while. 

Try and learn the terminology on your ticket.  It’ll let you know whether or not you get extra screening before you actually get in line. 

If you are traveling from Egypt, try and get a multiple reentry visa.  That’ll let you get back into Egypt without buying a temporary visa at the airport, and your current visa will be good till it expires.  It costs 61LE and you can get it in about 3hrs from Mugamma.

Once you get back in Egypt, there are travel companies offering rides from the airport, but they are extremely expensive.  I was told 57LE for about a 15min trip.  If you don’t mind walking out a bit you can find a black and white taxi (they are forbidden from waiting directly outside of the terminal).  You might want to negotiate terms first.  Even if it’s a short trip, drivers expect more if you are coming from the airport.

My last trip, a driver ran up to me, offering a ride.  I was leery at first, cause I didn’t see his taxi right away.  The last thing you should do, especially as a woman alone, is get in an unmarked car with some guy offering a ride.  Anyway, I asked him how much he wanted, and he waved the question off.  My mistake.  On the way out of the airport ( and Cairo airport is a city itself), he picked up an elderly couple.  They negotiated a rate of 20LE to Misr Jedida (Heliopolis).  I took note of this and when I got out, I handed the driver 20LE.  Misr Jedida is farther, no way was I gonna pay more for  a shorter ride.  He jumps out of the car, of course he wanted more, 40LE to be exact.  I said, NO WAY.  A crowd is forming now.  That’s what happens in any dispute here.  A bunch of people crowd around to mediate, or just to watch.  I complain that I never agreed to 40LE, and ask why are the Egyptians paying 20LE, he says ‘malish dawa’ (sp?), or none of your business, lol.  We finally agree on 30LE, which is not bad, considering with the travel companies you pay around 60LE.

I’ll add more stuff as I think of it, inshallah.

Third Culture Kids

I got that term from an expat homeschool group I belong to.  It refers to kids who’ve traveled/lived overseas most of their lives.  I wonder if my kids will end up like this.  Global citizens with no ‘home’ culture.  They are biracial Americans, living in Egypt.  They are familiar with three languages and somewhat fluent in two of them.  Dd loves America.  Our last day there, she was singing ‘good-bye America’, ‘good-bye clean streets’.  My son refers to America as a ‘kafir’ country, but he doesn’t necessarily favor Egypt.  My youngest hasn’t really expressed a preference as far as I can see.  But our experiences have certainly changed them.  They never saw poor people in America.  I mean REALLY poor, dirty clothes, homeless, type poor.  Here it’s in your face.  They are unfamiliar with typical American names.  My dd pronounces Barbara=Ba-bear-ra.  Once my youngest was reading a book, and she kept referring to a character as Tris.  I told her to let me see it.  It was Chris.  I corrected her, but she insisted on saying Tris, cause ‘Chris doesn’t sound nice.’  They don’t understand American slang (no big lost there), and sometimes copy the British venacular (thanks to being friends with a British family). 

A former friend of my husband’s claimed that they will grow up as outcasts.  Both for being raised outside of America and outside of public schools.  They won’t know how to deal with race.  I certainly don’t want them to be outcasts, but not sure what it means to ’fit in’ to American society.  Could be a good or bad thing, depending on how you are defining it.  I don’t want them fitting in with a lot of what I’ve seen in the blogging community, both from muslims and non.       

I don’t think term is necessarily suitable to the children of immigrants to America.  America has a way of swallowing foreigners, and by the second or third general, they are completely American.  At least in my experience. 

Egypt was not our first stop and I don’t know if it well be our last.  A return to the US is entirely possible.  Inshallah I hope they will be suitably prepared spiritually and educationally for whatever realities they face.   

Where have I been? In America!

I have had some major life changes, including dh moving to the states to work, and me and kids staying here in Egypt. And that is not all! Anyway, I went a little out of my head, and took a trip to the states without the kids. They stayed with their Quran teacher.

I traveled Egypt Air. To be honest, I have always looked down a bit on airlines from third world countries, preferring the European Airlines for international travel. But Arab carriers tend to be cheaper, and since we’re not rich, I have tried a few, including Air Morocco, and Tunisian Airlines. Egypt Air was pleasantly surprising. Unlike Moroccan and Tunisian Airlines, there was no alcohol being served. Mashallah, the dua for travel was made by the pilot, and flashed on a screen for passengers. That felt really good, to travel with people who believe that success in anything, including travel, lies with the Lord of the world.

I’ve spoken with people who won’t travel with European carriers, cause they don’t want to travel with ‘kaafirs’, but for me it’s always been a safety issue.  And as far as I’m concerned, you can’t tell any outward difference between the Europeans lines and the ‘muslim’ ones (except Egypt Air).  Well, mashallah, Egypt Air has been around for 75 years, they were the seventh carrier in the world and the first in Africa.  I don’t know how they rate for safety, but that is noteworthy experience. The only down side was that my luggage was lost.  I shopped til I dropped for clothes/toys for the kids (partly to make up for leaving them in Egypt). and they were really disappointed.  Alhamdulillah, I got a call at 4am two days after my arrival, and they had my stuff!  All of it!  And they delivered it to my door. 

America was a bit of a shock.  All that stuff, and for cheap!  Walmart!  Dollar Stores!  Dunkin Donuts!  There was too much to choose from and I couldn’t possible get a taste of everything I’ve been missing.  Seeing my dh was the best part.  He had everything waiting for me, red roses, chocolates, even TWIZZLERS, LOL!  12 days just was not enough time, especially when I had to meet with friends and family.  Also had a very interesting experience taking my drivers test (to renew) with an Indian named ‘George’. 

No problem going through US Customs, alhamdulillah.  Was waved right through.  This was my first time traveling  alone internationally so I was confused switching over to my connecting flight, but alhamdulillah made it.  For the first time I was asked to remove my niqab in America!  I’m used to it in Egypt, but usually they’ll get you a woman.  I did have one male officer who insisted I lift up my niqab, but he was probably curious (or miffed) because I insisted I am originally from America.  I always get that, going in or out of a muslim country.  First, where are you originally from.  Me: America.  No, originally, originally.  Me: America.  Where is your father from?  Me: He’s American too.  They finally give up and hand the passport back, after insisting on seeing my face (they want to make sure I am a REAL American?).

The trip back was ok, except  I left on yawm al-Arafat and arrived on Eid.  So no fasting and no Eid prayer for me!  The person who checked me in at Delta was a muslim, who gave salaams, then mentioned that the ssss symbol on the lower right part of my ticket meant I’d been picked out for ‘additional scrutiny’.  Then he  moved me to the front of the line, to the puzzlement of the white businessmen behind me.  The Ohare screeners were pretty nice (much better than New York, where I was told to spread ‘em and patted down).  Once back in Egypt the crew wished us kulli am wa antum tayyabeen.  Not really a substitute for missing Eid with family, but it’ll have to do.  I’d looked forward to getting some pics of all the slaughter that goes on in the streets, but most of it was finished by the time I got here.  Looking forward to my next visit with my dh!  

Ramadan Journal and pics

First day, I’m feeling good, I shopped, I prepared.  I had a menu for the entire month. 

I burn the food. 

Yep, and not once but twice.  So first day of Ramadan we order out from Yemen Al-Sa’eed.  Mandi, a yemen dish which is delicious.  You can order a platter or 1/4 up to one whole lamb.  We got 1/4, which a was plenty for us. 

I went really overboard with buying food/preparing special meals.  Which makes me feel guilty cause so many people don’t have enough.  There are places for people to get food in Ramadan.  The most famous is Maida Al-Rahman (Table of the Merciful).  They set up lighted tents throughout Cairo with tables and chairs.  Anyone can come and eat.

 

Some masaajid also serve food.  I visited the masjid that the kids Quran teacher cooks for, and mashallah, they really cook.  Fish, chicken, rice, salad.  Good food most of the people probably can’t afford.  Which is good.  If I had to depend on charity for food, I’d want something nice too. 

We did a few ‘Egyptian’ nights.  One night we had mashi, stuffed cabbage, eggplant, and grapeleaves.  I’d tasted it in arab restaurants in the states, but never liked it till I came to Egypt.  Egyptians are in a class by themselves as far as mashi goes.  We also had kushari, never really liked it much, but the kids love it.  Got recipe from ummurahma’s site, and turned out great.  I also made Hawawashi for the first time.  Seasoned ground beef, fried with onions and green peppers, stuffed into ish baladi (Egyptian pita) and either fried on top of the stove or cooked in the oven, covered with oil.   Most days I also made Qattayef.  Small pancakes stuffed with nuts, raisins, and and coconuts, then fried and soaked in sugar syrup.  To me the sugar syrup is overkill, so I sprinkle powder sugar on mine.  Here is one batch I made.

 

 

We decide not to get a fanoos.  The kids had small ones last year, but broke them.  I asked around about the origin of the tradtion.  According to one sister, it begin in the Fatimiyya period.  They fixed lanterns in the streets to light the way to the masjid, and they became associated with Ramadan.  Most buildings will display a fanoos, and there are small ones sold for kids.

   

Eid was ok. We prayed at Masjid Bilal.  The kids really look forward to the sweets that are given out, but they didn’t really get anything this time.  I guess they’ll just have to learn to go for the prayer, and not the sweets!  After the prayer, we went the their arabic teacher’s house, where the kids filled up on sweets, extremely sugary basbousa, and the homemade cookies people make for eid.

 

Obviously most of this stuff is not about the essence of Ramadan: sacrificing our food and sleep for the sake of Allah, charity, increasing our worship, but that kind of stuff is hard to put into pics.  Inshallah we all benefitted and will continue to benefit till next year.